Wednesday, December 1, 2010

I don't know

How do I go on when my world has fallen apart?

Why must I say goodbye to my child when our life together has only just begun?
How can I be brave when my worst fears have come true?
How can my eyes physically produce this many tears?
What can I do to feel better when nothing can change what has happened?

I don't know.

I DO know that little Miles is a part of our family now and forever, and I will be with him for eternity.
I know that Heavenly Father loves me, Dave, and our children and has a plan for our family.
I know that I am surrounded by prayers, fasting, thoughts, support, and love from everyone we know.
I know that I am honored to be the mother to a beautiful baby boy who is too perfect for this imperfect world.
I know that when I feel like I can't face another day, the Lord answers my prayers through each person who gives me courage, strength, and faith to endure.

Thank you for being that person. Thank you for each hug, note, prayer, thought, and bit of love. Not only do I appreciate it more than you know, I think I need it more than I know.

26 comments:

Jenny said...

We love you and Dave. We pray that you will be comforted during this awful time.

Lauren said...

oh holly....all i can say is that i love you and i am so so sorry this happened. you are in my constant thoughts and prayers. xoxoxo

Cara said...

Holly I am so sorry. You are in our thoughts and prayers.

Lorilee said...

it's hard to see what i'm typing because of all my tears, but i want you to know that i love your family..
and i can't explain how sorry i am that you can't be with your little babies right now. my heart truly break right along side yours and dave's.
i love you guys.

the johansen's said...

My heart is breaking for you and Dave. We are sending lots of love and prayers.

sarah marie. said...

oh holly. i am so extremely sorry. i love you and am praying for you and i admire the faith that you have.

the youngs said...

my heart is broken for your little family and i want you to know that i am thinking of you, very often. love you and love your perspective of eternal family. your kiddos are lucky that you are there mama.

Bruce and Melinda said...

so many hearts are broken with yours and dave's right now and even amid your devastation, you still spread love and faith. you are amazing holly! i'm so so terribly sorry and i love you!

Sarah said...

We can't stop thinking about you guys and are just so so sad about this. We pray for you every day, and love you guys so much.

Sophia said...

Love you Holly. I am thinking about you every minute.

Tiffany said...

You are both in our prayers and thoughts. Its hard to keep pushing forward, but great rewards to those that do!

The Weeds said...

I am so sorry for you loss, Holly. You are in my prayers. Be strong.
--Maere Baldwin Weed

P.S. said...

I love you Hols. I still go through different emotions of sadness, anger, frustration, disbelief and heart break. But most of the time I feel them all at once.
You are never from far my mind. Of course you know my constant thoughts and prayers are with you and Dave. Love you guys.

Dave and Tracy said...

Love you so much holly! You are such a strong, amazing person! I am thinking about you and praying for you.

Megan said...

Holly I love you so much! You are so amazing, you have such strength. You know I'm here for you, you are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so glad my brother has such an amazing wife. I know there's nothing I can say to make this easie but just know I love you.

The Barker's said...

My heart aches for you and our prayers are with your family. You truly inspire me.

Barb @ getupandplay said...

We have only met a handful of times but I have thought of you often. You are in my thoughts and prayers and heart right now.

caitlin said...

I admire your faith, I admire your strength, and I know you must be pretty freakin' amazing if Heavenly Father trusts you to go through this. You amaze me daily. So sorry for your pain.

Love, Caity

Danielle said...

Love you Holly

Ali Sorensen said...

I am so sorry about what happened. We are all praying for you and Dave and love you both so much!

Morgan & Geoff said...

I've been thinking about and praying for your family all week. Little Miles is lucky to have you as a Mama.

Anna said...

I'm so sorry, Holly. My heart is breaking for you. Love you, and am praying that you will find comfort during this difficult, sad time.

Meg and Colby said...

Holly, I have cried for you and your family so much these last few days since I heard the news. I know we need to stay positive, but it is truly unfair. I have loved our lunch dates over this past year. You have helped me more than you know by your example and positive attitude about life.

Lindsey said...

Been thinking of you much Holly!!! I'm so sorry for your loss and pray that your hearts can be healed....xoxoxo

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